Do you believe the lies that tell you that you are not enough? Lies that say: you will always fall short, you will never measure up, you will always feel less than, or you will never meet expectations? There is a way to embrace not being enough by accepting the truth of what God says about you! Discover the five fundamental truths you need to remember when you feel like you are not enough.
THE STRUGGLE WITH NOT BEING ENOUGH
Not enough. I’ve struggled with these two little words my entire life. And it has only taken several years and a very insightful counselor to help me embrace them. No matter how hard I tried, how diligently I worked, or how much effort I gave…I always felt like I fell short.
- Not pretty enough.
- Not smart enough.
- Not skinny enough.
- Not strong enough.
- Not liked enough.
Yes, I am in my 50s, and it is still a thing!
Six months ago, I received an email that included those very words: “Not enough.”
I know the intention was not to harm me or bring me down, but those black and white letters jumped off the page and pierced my heart.
And the replay of inadequacy and insecurity sent me downward into a black hole of discouragement and doubt.
Oh, you may look at me or even know me and think I have it all together. I don’t.
So, the Lord has taken me on a painstaking yet purposeful journey the past six months. And I have had to wrestle with the lies I have believed, the truth of what God says about me, and how this makes me enough.
THE LIES THAT TELL US WE ARE NOT ENOUGH
While many lies make us feel like we are not enough, these are the five foundational untruths we tend to believe when we struggle with our worth, identity, and purpose.
LIE #1: I AM INSUFFICIENT
What we say to ourselves: I am weak and do not have enough strength.
Why we can believe this lie: When we say that we are not enough, it usually has its roots in something we feel we are lacking. For some of us, we noticed this early in childhood when we compared ourselves to those around us. Maybe we looked at others at school and realized we could not read as fast or throw the ball as far. Or, as we grew, we realized that we did not have the same financial opportunities, family support, or emotional resources. And as adults, we continue to fall into the trap of comparison, feeling we fall short in terms of our careers, relationships, lifestyles, and overall sense of wellbeing.
How this lie impacts our lives: When we believe that we are insufficient, we operate from a place of scarcity. Instead of focusing on what we have, we become obsessed with what we feel we lack. Rather than viewing God as our hope and strength, sufficient to provide all our needs, we stay discouraged and defeated.
LIE #2: I AM INSIGNIFICANT
What we say to ourselves: I have no voice and do not matter.
Why we can believe this: Being raised in a family that did not value open and honest discussion or being in an environment that discourages self-expression can lead us to think that we have no voice. When we experience those who try to manipulate us through guilt and shame, we can shut down, believing that our emotions are insignificant and our thoughts do not matter.
How this lie impacts our lives: Believing that our words and feelings are unimportant to anyone intensifies feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness. When we look to others (instead of Jesus) for our identity, we will continually be disappointed and discouraged.
LIE # 3: I AM IGNORANT
What we say to ourselves: I do not know what to do. I am lost, stuck, and trapped.
Why we can believe this: Repeatedly being told that we do not have enough resources, opportunities, skills, money, or relationships can wear us down and render us immobile. We begin to distrust our abilities and question our perceptions. The fear of making a mistake, falling short, or failing completely keeps us stuck in the lie.
How this lie impacts our lives: We live an ineffective and unfulfilled life when we do not trust ourselves to make decisions, set goals, or live with purpose and intention. Instead of using our God-given talents and abilities, trusting that God created us to do good things, we stay stuck in the depressing cycle of “what ifs” and “if onlys.”
LIE #4: I AM INVISIBLE
What we say to ourselves: I must keep hidden because I am afraid to show my true self.
Why we can believe this: Ironically, being “too much” for some people is another lie that goes along with not being enough. When people reject, dismiss, or ignore us for being authentic and vulnerable, we tend to hide our true selves. We wear ourselves out trying to keep up false appearances to feel accepted and loved.
How this lie impacts our lives: To make ourselves invisible, we will wear masks to please others and gain their approval. Instead of embracing who Jesus designed us to be, we hide in fear and shame, never experiencing the freedom God wants to give us.
LIE #5: I AM ISOLATED
What we say to ourselves: I am alone and afraid.
Why we can believe this lie: If we have experienced hurt, loss, or rejection in relationships, we can accept the lie that it is too great a risk to reach out to others and that the safest place is to be alone. To protect ourselves, we build walls that keep us isolated and fearful.
How this lie impacts our lives: God created us to thrive in committed communities, so when we distance ourselves from others, we are going against our very nature. Because we want to avoid pain and suffering, we also miss out on love and connection. Distrust and distance further fuel disconnection and keep us locked in this vicious cycle of lies.
HOW GOD MAKES US ENOUGH
When we unpack why we feel that we are not enough, we realize that we have embraced many untruths about ourselves, others, and God.
After identifying what lies we choose to believe, why we may entertain the lies, and what impact these lies have on our lives, we now have a choice to make.
Will we continue embracing the lies that remind us that we are not enough?
Or are we willing to consider a powerfully radical, divinely counterintuitive alternate choice?
The choice to accept our “not-enoughness.”
God gives us the freedom to turn the whole thing upside down and proudly admit:
I AM NOT ENOUGH. And it’s okay.
When we do this, the lies lose their power over us.
Only when we are brutally honest, beautifully broken, and authentically vulnerable can we completely let go of trying to be enough.
Because the truth is we don’t have to be enough. For anyone. Ever.
God tells us to come as we are: messy, weak, and helpless. He welcomes, loves, and accepts us precisely BECAUSE we are not enough.
Instead, He offers us something radical and life-changing to meet us in those painful gaps of our “not enough-ness.”
It’s called GRACE. This grace is the unmerited favor of God given to us through faith in Jesus that fills in all of our gaps, holes, cracks and makes us more than enough.
And it is simply amazing because it is a free gift to all who will come, empty-handed, and own that we are not enough.
It is one of the most beautiful paradoxes of the Christian faith:
It is only in admitting that we are not enough that we become enough.
Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It’s God’s gift from start to finish! We don’t play the major role. If we did, we’d probably go around bragging that we’d done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.
Ephesians 2:8-10 (The Message)
So, when we cry out, “Lord, I am not enough!” He quietly whispers, “It’s okay because Jesus is enough.” My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9) And that is how I can embrace not being enough. And you can too.
5 BIBLICAL TRUTHS TO REMIND US THAT WE ARE ENOUGH
The most important thing you can believe about yourself is what God says of you. Please reread that slowly and out loud.
What God says about you is the TRUEST thing about who you are.
For those who struggle with never feeling like you are enough, this is the greatest gift I can give to you: Believe who God says you are!
The only hope you have of defeating the lies that say you will never be enough is fighting them with the truth found in God’s Word.
1) WHEN YOU FEEL INSUFFICIENT, THE BIBLE SAYS YOU ARE STRONG
So do not fear, for I am with you;
Isaiah 41: 10 (NIV)
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”
Philippians 4:13 (ESV)
2) WHEN YOU FEEL INSIGNIFICANT, THE BIBLE SAYS YOU ARE SIGNIFICANT, CHOSEN & ACCEPTED
O Lord, you have examined my heart
Psalm 139:1-4 (NLT)
and know everything about me.
You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.”
But you are the ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be a holy people, God’s instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you—from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted.”
1 Peter 2:9-10 (MSG)
3) WHEN YOU FEEL IGNORANT, THE BIBLE SAYS YOU ARE A SKILLFUL MASTERPIECE
And God is able to make every grace overflow to you, so that in every way, always having everything you need, you may excel in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8 (CSB))
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.“
Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)
4) WHEN YOU FEEL INVISIBLE, THE BIBLE SAYS YOU ARE SEEN LIKE A BEAUTIFUL LIGHT
Commit your way to the Lord;
Psalm 37:5-6 (ESV)
trust in him, and he will act.
He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday.”
You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”
Matthew 5:14-16 (NIV)
5) WHEN YOU FEEL ISOLATED, THE BIBLE SAYS YOU ARE SECURE
It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”
Deuteronomy 31:8 (ESV)
So we can say with confidence,
‘The Lord is my helper,
Hebrews 13:5b-6 (NLT)
so I will have no fear.
What can mere people do to me?’” Hebrews 13:5b-6 (NLT)
FREE PRINTABLE: BIBLE VERSES THAT TELL YOU THAT YOU ARE ENOUGH
If you are anything like me, you need visual and tangible reminders to help you defeat the lies that say you are not enough. Feel free to download and print this helpful chart that helps you turn around negative self-talk and thoughts with the truth found in Scripture. I keep it with my Bible study materials so that when I am tempted to believe that I am invisible, insufficient, insignificant, isolated, or ignorant—God says otherwise! And remember. what God says about us is the most important thing we can believe about ourselves.
WE CAN BE ENOUGH TOGETHER
The most unexpected truth I am learning on this journey is that it’s okay not to be enough. Why? Because God is enough, and He says that I am enough. And you are too.
I know God is not finished writing my “not enough” story, but, for now, I am a work in progress trying to replace lies with God’s truth.
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And if this post spoke to you in any way, would you mind leaving a comment, sharing it on social media, or even letting a friend know? I know it is hard to reject the lies, take off the mask, and be vulnerable, but my heart longs for this to be a place where it is okay to admit that we are not enough.
Very sound and insightful gudiance.
Thank you! I hope these truths encourage you!
Boy did I need this! You hit the nail on the head! Thank you for reminding me that it’s okay that I’m not enough because Jesus is THE enough that I need! And HIS opinion is the only one that matters!
So thankful that this post encouraged you, Patty! Remember, you are ENOUGH because JESUS makes you enough!