There are two things you can know for sure about changes in your life: 1) change is inevitable, and 2) change is necessary for growth. Understanding the 3 simple secrets of surviving these life changes will not only help you survive this time of transition but will hopefully help you thrive.
FROM ACKNOWLEDGMENT TO ACCEPTANCE
Welcome to Mindful Monday, dear friends! Whether you are approaching a significant life change that invigorates and excites you or a minor disruption that brings frustration and anxiety, AT THE CROSSROADS invites you to join others who are traveling the same road. Last week we learned to identify the 5 SIGNS TO KNOW IF YOU NEED TO CHANGE.
Today we want to learn how to move from acknowledging change to accepting it.
WHY IS CHANGE SO DIFFICULT?
We often resist the truth that life is seasonal, don’t we? While we are in one season, we cannot help but wish, hope, and pray that we were in another.
- When we are children, we long to grow up and assert our independence.
- When we are single, we hope to find the perfect soulmate and spend life together.
- When we have young children, we hurry them along in order to get some rest, energy, and time for ourselves.
- When we begin to age, we hold tightly to the “good old days” and rage against the passage of time.
And so the circle of life repeats.
THE GOOD & BAD OF CHANGE
But with adulthood comes responsibilities we did not anticipate. And sticking and staying in a committed relationship (soulmate or not!) takes a lot of effort. As we watch our children grow older and leave the nest, we pray that we could keep them small and under our care just a little while longer. And as we face the march of time and our own mortality, we look for ways to turn back the clock and become young again.
To every season…turn, turn, turn.
Why is it so difficult for us to embrace, accept, and be fully present in our current stage of life? Why do we long for life changes and then find it so hard to let go and move on when they arrive?
What are the secrets to surviving life changes?
3 SIMPLE SPIRITUAL TRUTHS
- CONTROL
- COURAGE
- CONTENTMENT
1) CONTROL
The most important thing we can understand to help us survive the changing seasons of our lives is that we are not in control. Let me say that again...there are many aspects of change that are out of our control. Time, for example. We cannot reverse it, revisit the past, or reveal the future.
He changes the times and the seasons…”
Daniel 2:21 (ESV)
This does not mean that we cannot or should not plan and prepare for changes in our lives, but our perspective should be realistic and humble. Giving up control to God permits us to be present during each phase of our lives and to avoid worrying about the changes ahead. It also enables us to trust God with both the good and bad aspects that each season can bring, knowing no season lasts forever and that he has a purpose and plan for everything.
2) COURAGE
Giving up control is an act of bravery that allows us to push past surviving to thriving during difficult transitions. It takes more courage to weather a season of drought, loss, or barrenness than it does to go harvesting where we have not planted.
Galatians 6:9 encourages us to not give up:
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”
Galatians 6:9 (ESV)
We will often plant in one season but not reap until another season.
- Waiting for a job to turn into a meaningful career.
- Waiting for a relationship to blossom and grow.
- Waiting for a child to take ownership and responsibility.
It is so easy to lose faith and hope during the season of planting as you stare at dirt fields waiting to see signs of life. You may find yourself in a season where the seeds you have been sowing do not appear to be producing an immediate crop. Do not give up or lose heart; there is no regular timetable for the harvest of life. Some crops you reap quickly; others take a long time.
3) CONTENTMENT
Once we give control to God and take courage in what we can do during each change in life, the result is contentment. We can thrive amidst significant life changes that may be sudden, unexpected, and life-altering because we have peace that no matter what happens, God will take care of us.
It allows us to rely fully on God’s promise in Ecclesiastes 3:11:
Yet God has made everything beautiful in its own time.”
Contentment changes our perspective. It is not putting a fake smile on your face and pretending everything is picture-perfect when it is not. It is, however, acknowledging that even through seasons of doubt, pain, anxiety, and loneliness, we can choose to trust God instead of our circumstances.
Paul shares his secret to living a life of contentment:
“…for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”
Philippians 4:11-13
So as you think about thriving (instead of merely surviving) during the constant changes in your life, please remember on this Mindful Monday that you have choices:
- You can survive or thrive.
- You can try to control or give control to God.
- You can be discouraged or take courage.
- You can be dissatisfied or content.
If you are looking for a community of fellow travelers who are trying to connect faith and life, why not consider joining me and others here AT THE CROSSROADS? Sign up to be an email subscriber today and receive a free e-book!!
Thanks for this word Carla. One paragraph that did touch me was the second paragraph. I must confess it isn’t easy when we sow and wait for a long time without getting results. Whe a farmer plants, he knows the time of his harvest depending on what he plants. This is, however, not the same with life. We sow today, we don’t know when the reaping will come. As a result, many people surrender to disappointments and bow to discouragement.
However, I am not unmindful of various bible passages telling us not to give up in well doing as we re bound to reap the fruit of our well doing in due season if we don’t give up. The word “due season” is what many people do not understand. The waiting period where we wait on God is the most difficult period in the life of any Christian.
But we know we are more than conquerors in Christ.
Thanks